Morning alarms and maltreatment literally are two faces of one coin named ‘Welcome To Hell’. Yeah, it might feel very intimate and soul-satisfying conviction to scarcely any and very churlish and obnoxious to the rest. Well, I lie in none of them. For me, the situation is something equivalent to how a weak sighted person would give importance to the features of an ant while passing through a street at a busy day of work. For me my wake up call starts since the very moment I step onto my (oh so alluring yet ridiculed for its job) bed. 

It is not long ago when I became cognizant of my condition – umm less than 3 years. Yep I was diagnosed with a (not so crucial but still not salubrious) syndrome. I am able to see the good but then demoralize the good simultaneously without endeavour. Today; when somehow my dreams are a step ahead, I consciously come 1000 steps back though never willingly. My tendency of doing things are inevitably too high to be stopped but by my precipitous switch of doing the obverse, which might not be voluntarily, it freaking happens. My brain somehow adjusts to the change ghastly and convinces my heart for the good coming ahead in my life. It is really harrowing to accept changes sometimes but then it always seems more cushy than my first verdicts. 

When Tagetes accelerate the delirium,

Opuntia prick to the point of mopery.

When aardvarks tag along with

A spate of legion yarns whole night.

When finches unequivocally vanquish top-tier musicians,

Whether at dawn or a little late.

When Saturn V rocket launch can’t rouse her,

As if hibernating for the entire life.

When either acute fainting is tolerable

Or ready to make theropods head for the hills.

I am pretty sure I sound like a dumb trying to talk to herself but then I always believe people don’t understand me. I wonder if one day I opt for death even when life seems more propitious. I dunno. Until then just trying to live in the moment.